What I’m reading this week is a cute little book called The African American
Guide to Meditation, Affirmation and Prayer by William A. Brown, Jr. This past summer I saw this book at an African bookstore across from Howard University. I hope from reading this book I can learn how to write my own affirmations and make it a daily part of my life.
Talk Back: What books are you reading this week?
This week I’ve been 
on a mission to choose my words carefully. Not just with other people, but primarily with myself. I’ve been focusing my energy this week on reading books, Bible passages and listening to songs that carry the same theme – understanding the power of what you say.
When I was growing up my mother never allowed my sister and I to say the word ‘I can’t.’ If I ever struggled doing something and grew frustrated the first words out of my mouth were ‘I can’t.’ Hearing these words upset my mother. She never wanted me to be satisfied with giving up. Instead, she wanted me to use my brain and figure it out.
Too many times we talk ourselves out of things. We say ‘I can’t’ with our words and sometimes with just our actions. If you aren’t sure you’re the type of person who does this, just ask your friends. I had a talk with a good friend who basically told me that my negativity towards myself was very unattractive. Wow! His harsh words were just the bitter medicine I needed. Nobody likes to be around a negative Nelly! If someone says your talented, beautiful, or just that you have on a cute outfit etc… learn to say thank you and leave out the negativity. Don’t counter their compliments with your own negative thoughts. We teach people how to treat us by how we treat ourselves.
I find that I’m a positive person when it concerns other people, but when it comes to being encouraging and positive towards myself it’s a challenge. Negative self-talk isn’t just internal. It’s like poison that touches ever aspect of your life – from work to church and among friends and family.
After this conversation with my friend I decided I would re-evaluate how I view myself. I needed to treat myself better.
What if the key to my success was simply just saying it and believing it? I plan to find out. It all starts with a strong foundation. For the next few weeks I plan to speak life over myself and my goals. I will live and speak success.
Tonight I’m going to look in the mirror and I’m going to tell myself I’m beautiful. Then I’ll do the same thing in the morning too. Over the weekend I’ll write out some daily affirmations and I’ll share some great affirmations I’ve found on the blog this coming Sunday.
Talk Back: Have you experienced times where you had to encourage yourself? How has positive thinking changed your life?
Here’s a song I listen to this week by Gospel artist Donald Lawrence called “Let the Word Do the Work” that really touches on the power of our words. If you aren’t jamming at the end of it then something’s seriously wrong..ha! Check it out here: http://youtu.be/pl0ld7anIC8
Tonight begins something new. For many finding the right job can be a challenge and a bit discouraging. Get The Job Q&A is an opportunity for job seekers to tell their story and build business connections. If you know of a job opportunity for the seeker please contact me directly at mariadjames [at] gmail.com.
Photos provided by Kia Jefferson
Quick Snapshot
Name: Kia Jefferson
Current Location: Washington, DC Metro Area
Type of Job Wanted: Public Relations/Communications/Marketing
Willing to Relocate: Yes
_______________________________________________________________________________________
Q: Tell us a bit about you
A: I guess my story starts with BET. I don’t know what age I was, but I was young…perhaps middle school. BET came on only at night and I would stay over my girlfriend’s house to watch. Donnie Simpson, Sherry Carter….those Video Soul episodes did something to me. Years later in high school – it was Oprah. This black woman had her own show on a major network. Wow! I then started seriously considering a career in communications. Everyone, my family included, thought such a career would not be steady but I wouldn’t take no for an answer. I went on to graduate from Lincoln University in Pennsylvania and at that time they didn’t have a Communications Department – I had to take all my courses at Temple University in Philadelphia my junior year. The program was competitive and expensive but I didn’t let that stop me. Since Lincoln didn’t have a communications department, I was on my own to find my own internships and mentors. I went on to become a National Association of Black Journalists (NABJ) intern and was placed in Missouri the summer upon graduation – I even won an anchor spot (one of two) during their yearly convention. After that and an entry level job in television (Production Assistant), I landed a job in Public Relations in my hometown of Harrisburg, Pennsylvania. After 3 years of sending my resume to BET – once on a coffee mug in a recipe format, I eventually got in – as a temp. in BET’s tape library. Everybody thought I was crazy but I knew my gamble would eventually pay off. I left my family and friends behind and moved to the outskirts of Washington, DC. After a year of shoveling tapes I landed in the marketing department. I was now booking events with Sherry Carter- the same personality that captured my interest in childhood. After my position was eliminated in 2001, I was rehired in 2007. In 2010 I was downsized due to the slow economy and department reorganization.
Q: What are you doing now?
A: Since then, I have been job searching. Monday- Friday, I get up like I am going to work and I am on the computer – searching websites, sending out resumes, re-connecting and networking. I have been fortunate to land some clients and have started a consulting business, Creative Consulting, but the work is not steady.
Q: What would be your ideal job?
A: My ideal job would be one that has some type of creative element and is primarily in the communications or marketing department. This element can be found in a variety of industries (Non Profit, Private, etc). Example- writing proposals, researching demographics, working with clients, promoting/coordinating events. I would love to have a voice for a multicultural project or an organization that values the voice of an underserved population.
Q: Tell us something unique about you
A: In 2005, I was hand selected among 1,000 applicants to be on the Barbie Collector panel in LA. As an avid black Barbie collector, this was a dream come true. At that time, I had the idea to pitch Mattel on an African American sorority series. As my sorority’s centennial approached, Alpha Kappa Alpha (AKA), I focused my efforts on an AKA Barbie. After 3 years of pitching, researching and keeping in touch with the marketing professionals at Mattel, the AKA barbie was born. To date, that is my proudest accomplishment. It confirmed that my love for ethnic marketing, my ideas and today’s multicultural audience are all relevant.
Read the article: BET Article- Barbie Shows up at AKA Rush
http://www.bet.com/news/news/2008/02/11/newsarticlealphakappaalphabarbie.html
Connect with Kia directly on LINKEDIN
This weekend I had the opportunity to read some really great blogs with three different points of view on handling relationships when you’re single.
All three blogs struck a chord in my soul and each has helped guide me on my journey to live boldly and fearlessly this year.
Check out what I’m reading:
Black and Married with Kids.com -
Life Comes Full Circle
Why I like this blog: The author, Shira Williams, takes personal responsibility for her role in a series of bad relationships. Although she starts out feeling depressed, she decides enough is enough and slowly begins to live again. Day-by-day Shira learns to find herself through prayer and writes about changes in a prayer journal.
I can relate to the author’s feelings and I like how her turning point comes after recognizing a negative pattern in HER choices. She then decides to do something different.
Although I’m not quite 35 yet, I understand her plight. I worry myself if I too will be one of those women who remains single forever. I silently worry if I’ll miss that golden window of time to have children of my own. What touches my heart that out of her silent grief Melanie comes to the realization that she must now redefine what “happily ever after” means. Kudos to her for redefining her life based on reality.
The Fooler Initiative – The UnFunny Post To Women
This week’s Go Get IT Girl is Rochelle Yanique, a woman who listened to her entrepreneurial spirit and started her own business.
If I was asked 5 years ago what I’d be today, I would probably never say entrepreneur. I always loved politics and as president of my student government in high school, I knew I would be working in government. I still have my passion for politics, but I found that my natural talent of styling hair could serve as a means to make money while in school.
The motivation to start my own company came while I was a graduate student at the University of Miami. With little money, I had to find creative ways to keep up with the latest trends. Having already acquired basic knowledge about hair from years of going to the hair salon, I started to blog about different techniques I would try. Before long, word about my techniques and the fact that I could do hair spread fast on campus.
Today, I enjoy the best of both worlds. I have a great career in government and I also have the opportunity to educate others about my passion for hair styling. Through my blog (www.iamrochelle.com ) I offer invaluable information for young women who like me, are searching for inexpensive ways to keep up with the latest hair trends.
The motto that I live by is “The Fear of God is the Beginning of Knowledge”– no amount of formal education can be equated to the understanding of the power of God.
I came into 2012 with a mental itch. Something bothered me about the past few years of my life, so I grabbed a journal and began to just write over the Christmas holiday. I had to discover where this irritant was coming from.
I figured out the thing that bothered about the past few years was that I’d stopped living and my soul was saying enough is enough.
When I reviewed my life to come up with my goals and desires for the new year I noticed a common thread – fear. I let fear drive my decisions and that’s a miserable life. The one thing I knew was I wasn’t happy because I wasn’t being Maria.
The Maria I knew was the little girl in Kindergarten had enough of being last in line and decided today was the day she would be first in line. Who took the argument for why she should be first to the teacher and then cried to prove how passionate she was (hey, by any means necessary, right?). It worked!
The Maria I knew didn’t know much about stepping, but boldly auditioned for the Society Step Team in high school (and made the team), took on the role of editor of her high school newspaper and signed up for Trigonometry the last semester of my senior year – even at the dismay of my mother since Math had been my weakest subject (and passed with a B).
The Maria I knew confidently walked into the School of Communication orientation my Freshman year of college and told the head of the department that she would be the editor of the school newspaper (it happened). The Maria I knew walked boldly. She was confident and tackled challenges head on. Where was she? Wherever she was I knew wanted her back!
More importantly, who told her she couldn’t? Who told ME that I couldn’t be what I wanted to be and accomplish what I desired? And why did I listen? On Sunday I watched a YouTube video of Bishop T.D. Jakes discussing how fear is holding us back.
I encourage you to click the link above and listen for yourself. I certainly was inspired.
Here are a few poignant words from the video that motivated me:
I decided to go into the next year with the following theme: Going Big in 2012 – Be Bold. Live Fearlessly. I’ll spend this year on a journey to reconnect with Maria again. I hope my journey inspires you on your own path to pursue your goals and dreams fearlessly.
This year the Go Get IT Girl blog will feature more articles geared towards helping you do just that. Go for it! The blog will now be updated every Tuesday and Thursday.
Sound off: Tell us what goals your going after in 2012?
Follow Me Through RSS Feed
What Do You Think?